Could it be true?

Could it be true? Am I really nearly finished? I think so. I have spent the last four days getting square eyes just so I can finish this last film, Biodiveristy. The research is done, the reflective diary is getting there and film 3 is looking pretty good. I've spent four days solid on this film, playing around with the sequence, text and music, and I think I have come up with something that I am pleased with. No, I am very happy with what I have come up with. It's been a very stressful couple of days and I am sacrificing my personal life to complete this thing. Biodiversity has certainly been both the easiest and hardest film to complete. Easiest because I've enjoyed doing it, this is the one film that I looked forward to editing because of the content of the film (nature) and hardest because of the lack of time and help I have had to do the film. It's tricky to know if you;re doing the right thing or not when you don't get a second opinion. So I will do what I can and at a standard that I am happy with, and then on Wednesday I will show Dani what I have and hopefully he will say it's great and I can put it on a film and hand it in.
The plan is to complete the film tonight and focus on the diary and research tomorrow, print it all off (that section done) and go back to the finishing touches on the film on Wednesday morning. Wish me luck!

Getting it together

Since handing in my disertation, things have literally gone from bad to worse. And i'm okay with it. After I handed in my disertation I then had Film 3 - Biodiversity to think about. I collected the lap top and discovered that it didn't work, so Thursday morning at 5am i flapped about a bit, then did some filming around the lake until the reasonable hour of 8am came around, and then I called Dani and asked if he would be my saving grace. His reply = yes, come in and i'll fix it. Note to self (Buy Dani something to say thanks) So after my little lap top incident, I had Kat's help with filming some more shots of 'pretty things'. I then discovered the lap top didn't like the idea of logging and capturing. I thought about calling Dani and seeing if he knew what was wrong with it, but the time was 10 pm, so i went with my usual technique when things don't work...I hit it. I know what you're thinking, and yes perhaps I am a little bit crazy and careless when it comes to technology, but....guess what? The lap top started to log and capture. I'm sure these things have a conscience. With all the tech difficulties i thought to myself 'I'll go out for a ride on the horse to chill out', great idea, what i hadn't expected was an evil driver with a caravan, who clearly doesn't understand the meaning of driving slow in the countryside. It really really bugs me when city folk come to the countryside and complain about there being horses on the road. Hello, people? You're in the countryside!! If you don't like it, go back to where you came from! I remember having a road accident when i was 16 on my Thoroughbred Pateley, a man was driving at 70 mph along the little single track country road, saw me and slammed on his brakes and nearly skidded into us. Pateley ended up spinning around in the middle of the road because he was so terrified and the man was in a hedge and then had the cheek to have a go at me!! I thought, you cheeky sod, if you weren't going so fast none of that would have happened. People are always in a rush and have no patience for anybody else, and risk the lives of others just to get somewhere a little sooner. I'm sure if that man had killed me and my horse, he wouldn't have been worrying about his crappy car.
Anyway, back to work matters. So, after having difficulties with tech stuff, I started to pull together a rough cut. I'm struggling with the message and rhythm of film 3. I have lots of shots and stills of pretty things but am finding it difficult to put it into a story. Which things look nice next to each other, what works and what doesn't and how well do they convey what it is that i am trying to get across. I think this film can be edited quite quickly as i've learnt a lot through experiementing with my other two films. I am overcoming these problems by working on the text and then matching up the text with shots that compliment the words, which is creating a basic story plot. And then I am experiementing with the shots to see where they fit in best. I am finding it difficult to decide whether i should keep all the domestic animal shots together and all the plant shots together and so on, or whether i should mix them up...any thoughts?

freak out

I am 500 words away from finishing my disertation. And i can't help but look at it and think: is this what i have been working towards? Three years of studying, and all i can show for it is a crumby piece of written work that i don't even really like. To top all this depressive, negative feeling about my work i am panicing about what next... what do i do when i finish? What do i want to do? The answer: I have no idea. I don't know what i want to do, I don't really know what job i want, I don't even know if i'll get a job. And if that wasn't bad, i really do have to buy a new car. The mondeo has a rather large hole in it now and when it rains, my footwells flood, the passenger seat gets wet, all that shabang. And... guess what? It rains a lot in England!! Right now i feel like i've hit rock bottom. I'm leaving uni with only one option... move back home. ARGH!. I'm thinking that if all else fails, i could do a postgrade. Don't know where though, I don't even know if they'll accept applicants this late now. I don't even know if i could get another loan to pay for it. This is what I am facing people! I don't know anything! In an ideal world, I will have a wonderful job within the month with a company that i really want to work for, I will have a fab little flat or house and be happy and content. But, that's not what has happened.
I have been at home with my family all weekend, and since i have been back my mum has asked me the same questions every day! 'Are you making the right decisions? Do you know what you want to do? I thought you wanted to stay in Bristol and work for somewhere like Tigress? Will you be happy moving back here?' My answers: I have no idea! I also have no idea! Yes, i did want to stay in Bristol and work for Tigress, but there's one teeny weeny problem...i don't have a job in Bristol, let alone one with Tigress. No job = no house. Will I be happy moving back here? Obvious answer = probably not, but i don't really have a choice anymore. I am literally going out of my mind. I have said 'fuck' sixteen times today, wait...seventeen times! I need just a little bit of help and a lot of positivity, oh and a fairy godmother with a magic wand.

Film 1 and 2

Film 1 and 2 are completed! Done and dusted, finito! Olivia has the copies and is happy. So another job well done. The film Energy was in fact easier to edit than Recycling. I think this may have been due to the fact that I am more experienced with using FCP, but generally, this film is much simpler than the first one, shorter and with less shots. I am hoping that film 3 will be as easy to put together as film 2 was. I will be filming next week (hopefully) and that gives me four days to edit like crazy. I'm starting to feel the pressure! University work is slowly but surely sapping all the happiness from me, i actually want to bury myself in a hole, and wait for the whole thing to blow over. I can normally handle pressure quite well, but for some reason (maybe it is because this is the end of uni) I am finding everything extra challenging. There's a mixture of worry about handing work in and to a quality I am happy with, finding a job, a place to live (which I have given up on and will move back in with the old dear, just long enough until I find my feet again) and knowing what it is that I want to be doing. First things first though: I have film 3 to complete. The edit should be fairly straight forward, I haven't experienced any problems with editing as yet (apart from a slight colour correction error on the first film, which I might add, I didn't do) so I am hoping that editing film 3 should be a simple step by step edit. But then again, nothing seems to work out the way I want it to.

So much to do in such little time.

Eco Campus has been put on hold for the time being as I have 12,000 words to hand in by the 13th May. I still have 5,000 words left to write. After my other module work is handed in I can put all my energy into my films. I only need one day to sort out the first two films.
There are some changes that I would like to make, which include: Changing back the colour correction that was put on the first film. I think the correction that was out on it makes it look too bright and fake, the edges have become blurred and generally I think it looks less professional. I also need to change the title which says Ecocampus, because it is in fact two words, not one. The second film needs to have the background carried on throughout and the music needs to be made. The final film needs everything doing to it. I should be able to get the work done by the 27th, with good time management and a lot of cups of tea, all will be well. I hope.

I'm trying not to worry about what will happen after univeristy. I'm looking at possible jobs in other areas, not just Bristol. Oxford seems like a nice place with a lot of jobs going at the moment. It'll be expensive to live there, but probably not much more than Bath. I'm trying to keep options open and am reviewing what skills I have, so I can see what jobs I can apply for.

Second thoughts

With less than a month left of university, I am starting to question what it is that I want to do with my life, and what if I make the wrong decision? I am worrying myself sick about that question...What should I do? What job do I want? Where do I want to live?
And the answers: I don't know. I do know this though...I am debating my career choice and looking into what really makes me happy. And anyone who knows me, knows that what does really make me happy is being in the countryside, surrounded by dogs and horses. Well, maybe not surrounded, but you get the idea. Before I came to university I started working in my spare time as a pet sitter/dog walker/horse rider, and I loved it! I got a lot of work and even now I still have the same people contacting me wanting me to look after their pets when they are away. And i only advertised in one (very small) town three years ago! And with 380 millions pounds spent on pets (mostly dogs) every year (I don't spend every waking minute researching animals...i know this figure through the Kennel Club) I figure, some of that money could belong to me. It is no big secret that farmers and such like are very rich, because animals is where the money is at, people will always have pets, they always need to eat (on the farming side) and now more than ever, they are concerned for the future, the economy, the environment and where their food and such like is produced. So i figure, with the knowledge that I know, I could, maybe stick with that. Part time smallholder, part time animal carer or something. I don't know. But I do know what makes me happy...being with the people I love, doing the things I love and having time to enjoy them. (urgh this is getting horribly soppy) So i figure, being in the media may just be a little bit too complex, too demanding, too time consuming and controlling for a simple country gal like me, who enjoys cooking, walking dogs, making crafts (although I wouldn't admit it if you asked me), writing, travelling, attempting to sail the boat, wandering aimlessly across fields I'm not supposed to be in and chilling with friends and family. And I don't know if working in the media is going to give me enough time to enjoy all the things that make me who I am.

Back to reality

It has been nearly a week since I came back from Oz. Those last few days abroad were by far the best. I snorkelled in the Great Barrier Reef, it took a lot of guts for me to do that, and i probably wouldn't have if the guide hadn't pushed me in the water. Me and seven other people plus the one quide bobbed in the middle of the sea when a massive manta ray appeared, it was longer and wider than me! I've never seen seven people huddle so close in such a large space. It was a great sight and a rare one and what an experience!! What i wasn't prepared for in the water was the sheer force of the waves, and I am a very strong swimmer. One man (the seasick German - named so, because he was sick the whole way to the reef, in the reef! and back to land!Naturally no one swam anywhere near him) Anyway, he wasn't a strong swimmer and kept getting washed up onto the reef and dragged back away by the tide, so the quide had to pull out an inflatable ring and drag the seasick German all the way around the reef. That annoyed me big time...what if a shark came and tried to eat us, and our guide is looking after the man who can't swim or stop vomiting. I spent a lot of time looking for things that could eat or kill me in the water. I only spotted a few and thankfully they kept their distance from me. The biodiversity in the reef is beyond words. My photos of it are crap because the camera is crap and everything looks blue. But down there it is far from blue. Every colour of the rainbow is on the reef, the fish were in their thousands and a couple of us got a nice, but painful welcome from the flourescent parrot fish, in the form of blowing water into our ears then waiting and looking to see if any food came out of this new hole they had found. The fish range from tiny clown fish, who if you touch their home come out and see what you are, only to swim backwards even faster as soon as they see you to massive wrass who were nearly 3 metres long. I picked up a sea cucumber (it feels like a wet avocado) and was accompanied by small black and white stripy fish the whole time who thought my hair was a great hiding place (stupidly didn't tie it up) and coming out of the water an hour later and wrinkly like a prune, i wanted to go back in.
That was my last day, and on the Friday I did the 25 hour journey back to London, i didn't sleep and had the family from hell behind me whose kids screamed and kicked my chair nearly the whole time. I slept for three hours and couldn't force myself to eat the nasty plane food so when I arrived in London at 6am and it was raining, i felt more exhausted and was too tired to even bother standing out of the rain when waiting for the taxi.
Coming back to Bath i remembered that I still had 8,000 words to write and another film to make and a society to organise. It is Friday, and I stilll have 8,000 words to write, to make my final film and organise the society. I need another holiday!
I did however recieve some good news on the film front...Tim Middleton had written an email to Nic saying how impressed he was with Eco Campus and the AWM team, so all thumbs up there and I had the chance to meet him last night.
To Do for this week:
Everything.

Maggie Island

Magnetic Island, well what can i say...perfect paradise. That place has definitely won me over but unfortunately, all good things must come to an end. It really was everything I hoped it would be and more. The jet skiing was scary as, a combination of speed on a little powered motor while knowing that just underneath you could be a box jellyfish or a shark. Suprisingly I was happier on the canoe, which is closer and easier for sharks to attack but the lack of speed meant i was going to fall off. And i got time to see sea turtles, which were just huge. Horse riding was great, met up with another backpacker, Charlotte and we went swimming on the horses in the sea (with stinger suits on mind). I caught my first fish!!! After god knows how long of trying, luck struck, after catching a grunter, three other fish followed, two butter fish and a flat head. All of them tasted great! So i'd survive if i was stuck on an island, so long as i have a rod and some bait. Met some great people and had an awesome time drinking beer under the stars every night. Back to Cairns tomorrow then fly back home.

The wonderful wizard of Oz

And i'm back...those ants will have to bite harder then that to keep me in this place. I'm still not feeling too good, but, being me, i'm bored out of my tiny little mind. Screw the medication, i'd rather have the pain then sleep my holiday away. I feel like i've wasted the last four days, and missed my trip to Sydney :( So with my wits about me now i'm off the killer medication that knocks you out i am outta here. There are a couple of things that are grating on me about the Aussies now and putting me well off them...the racism, the rudeness and on the family side, the control. My god i can't even use the computer without being asked what i'm doing. There's a neat little song i heard about Aussies that springs to mind every now and again - 'get your stars, get your stars, get your stars off our fucking flag' Time to leave Wulguru and head for paradise, which comes in the form of Magnetic Island. White sandy beaches, palm trees...perfect. I'm going there tomorrow, and today, i'm going to Billabong to see some crocs! I've heard there are loads about and last month a young man got eaten by a 5.2 metre long croc, and considering danger always calls me, i'm going to check it out. No point coming to Oz and not seeing a croc. There's a sanctuary where all the man eaters are taken, cause it's illegal to kill a croc here, unless there's a good reason...i think eating someone is a good reason! Think i'll check that out too on the way, i know it's morbid and curiousity killed the cat and everything, but what is life without a few risks eh?
This tiny little stray dog appeared at the front porch yesterday when everyone was at work, and now the little tick infested mongrol wont leave. I feel really sorry for it, cause it's kinda cute, like Tramp off Lady and the Tramp, but it's off to the pound :( I know that if i lived here, that poor little thing would be staying with me, so probably a good job i don't and it's kept the cats away :) Pushka keeps scratching me so i locked her in the basement for a few hours until everyone came back the other day (cruel i know) but that thing is nasty and i was sick of getting me feet scratched whenever i walked.
Well, this will probably be my last post, because after Maggie Island i'll be cruising back to Cairns and in the Barrier Reef, so see you all on the 27th! x

Down under 2

It's been a long few days, have arrived in Wulguru and am doing the family stops, seeing everyone over Easter. They're all very nice, a little loud and brash, but good hearted. The only ones that don't like my presence are the cats, Molly and Pushka, but they could just be sensing that I don't really like cats. Other than those two, everyone has been very welcoming, especially Liz, who is 'mothering' me and has been brilliant, which is a good thing indeed as I'm not well (no suprise there). I knew it would only be a matter of time before something bit or stung me that would be nasty. I thought i was getting away pretty easy on the 'nasties' front. I went swimming in a creek, where there are eels and crocs half a mile up. I wasn't the only one, around afternoon is a fairly safe time to swim and lots of kids and locals were swimming. It's safer swimming in aligator creek than the sea here! I would like to say I was bitten by something cool, but instead i've been got by some ants! I was fishing (caught an eel btw) and found myself attacked by them - and I've definitely come off worse than the ants. These ones (i can't remember their name) are really agressive, more so than the green one i got bitten by last week and are bright red and much bigger. The bites have given me flu like symptons and from my waist down it aches and of course the bites are very sore and itchy. I'm on some sort of tablets/medication that numbs the pain and makes me really drowsy. I am hoping by Thursday i should be back on my feet and will move on from family territory (as much as I like them, I prefer doing my own thing). I will probably have to cut out one of my trips now because of those bloody ants. I only have four more places I want to go...further into the outback, Sydney, Magnetic Island, and the Great Barrier Reef again, but until I feel better i wont be going anywhere :( In fact, I'm fairly impressed that I wrote this without falling asleep and i think i've spelt everything right.

Down under

I've seen loads of spiders now! Golden orbs mostly. Got bitten as well by a green tree ant, otherwise known as the acid ant. It does what it says on the tin - its bite burns your skin like acid, and now i have a nice thing on my leg which hurts more than anything i've felt before.
Went into the rainforest yesterday...wow is all i can say. I walked around the tracks (you'd have to be pretty stupid to walk off the tracks) and met some aboriginals. I took the skyline back to the town and saw lots of parrots and insects. The food here is amazing, the nicest food i've tasted anywhere. They have traffic lights which sound like pacman! and all cars turning left don't have to stop at traffic lights cause they have right of way, so crossing the road feels like pac man! I heard the best advert on the tram yesterday too...'my man is a 2min man and i hate it, i want to trade him in for a new man.' 'You're lucky, my man is a 1.30 man, but i've found something to help.... if you're man has premature ejactuculation... bla bla bla' Well. i thought it was funny, i actually laughed out loud!

I have left Cairns and have headed down South, i want to go back to Cairns for a couple of days before i leave still. I went through the tablelands, which is a rish outback, it looks like Wales! The tableslands is where a lot of fruit and coffee is grown and dairy herds. I visited a palace near Atherton, it has a sad story behind it, like most beautiful palaces do....it was built by a man here for his Italian sweetheart, it took him 5 years to build and when he went to Italy to bring her over he found that she had married another man, so he married her (ugly) sister instead. The palace is mostly fallen down now, but still quite a sight.
I arrived in Townsville yesteday, it looks similar to America, but a lot more dated. it's quite an easy base for me so i can get to other places easily. I'm going to Billabong tomorrow to see some crocs and Magentic island for a few days to go jet skiing, walking and horse riding. it's like a tropical island with white sand and palm trees, should be a nice little paradise for me to catch some rays and chill out with the sea turtles. Next week i'll head to Sydney and the Blue Mountains and catch up with my cuz. In the meantime i'm going fishing today, Barramundi are supposidly easy to catch, which is what a beginner like me needs and i'll be back at the place i'm staying in for 6pm because the cockatoos and moutain parrots pass by. I watched them yesterday, hundreds of birds flying past, they like wet bread i've heard, so i'll see if i can tempt them closer.

Australia

G'day all!

After a few days of flying I have finally arrived in Oz. I flew over the Himalayas and the Great Barrier Reef and arrived in Cairns yesterday. Booked into a 4* hotel for a couple of days (because why not, truefully the idea of backpackers involved lots of insects)
I've been for a wonder around the town (picture this...a town in the middle of a tropical rainforest) it is more beautiful then i imagined, the plants and animals are amazing, tropical birds and flying foxes (big ass bats) are just outside and sqawk all night long. Haven't seen a snake or a spider yet! The flight was the worst thing, it doesn't help that my circulation is poor and my legs swell up. Hong kong was cool, great food!
The heat here is immense, but adjusting. Am going to chill today and sort things out, then tomorrow i'll be going more into the rainforest via skyline and train. Then maybe the GBR before heading to Townsville.
It's so nice here, really relaxing and chilled out and of course amazingly gorgeous.
Will keep you all posted. See you in three weeks! x

Onwards and upwards

What a wicked day! I'm definitely feeling uplifted (maybe it's the wine, or the amazing evening I had), but I do feel strangely focused and satisfied, even if I can't quite put my finger on the reason why.

I would like to say that after only a week of editing I have nearly finished Energy! All I have to do is check everything and put a title on it, then wait for Mike to complete the music and big badda boom, hey presto, off it can go. I'm not too sure if it's any good, but i've had a thumbs up from the handful of lovely people at AWM. I'm hoping to officially hand over the dvd to Olivia tomorrow and complete Energy (minus music), so that I can fly off to the land of Aussie's without worrying too much about filming.

That leaves me to write 10,000 words in Oz! It's all possible. I'm sure I can spend that 26 hour flight writing something worthwhile. If only I could be enthused to actually write anything. I think that is the only reason why I haven't done much yet, because it bores me. I'm tired of writing when i'm told to write. It takes the pleasure out of writing anything.

Tomorrow is my final day to do something productive before I go to Australia. I have so much to do, like change my money up and find my passport! As well as all the work I need to do and collect. I'm so excited about going to Oz, i've been waiting for April to come around ever since I booked my ticket back in September. I'm hoping that as well as having the most amazing time ever and catching a glorious tan, I will find inspiration to complete my work and have time to reflect on my life at the moment and my future goals. I don't spend enough time thinking deeply about things and nearly four weeks of little contact (my phone wont work out there and I doubt I will spend more than once a week at a computer to use the internet) will do me some good. The only thing i'm worried about is missing people and not doing work (must...think...positively).

Sweet success

This morning I met with the enviornmental team to show them my finished product of Recycling. They were over the moon about it, they couldn't congratulate me enough and said: 'This is fantastic, it does everything that we need.' They will be showing the film to the board and the Vice Chancellor, Alun Thomas, putting it on their website, having it projected at the introduction meetings for new students at the beginning of September. And for me, they will email Steve May about how pleased they are with the film and sing my praises, and they said they will speak with the head and see if they can get the films on a showreel at graduation for everyone to see! I'm going to be meeting with the enironment board to launch the films and the environmental champions in May.
It's odd, because I wasn't too please with Recycling, and the more I watch it, the more changes I want to make, but seeing the film from their eyes I could see that what I had done may not have been a masterpiece, it certainly isn't going to win any awards, but it did do exactly what they wanted it to do. I made the environment team happy, and supplied what they needed, and for me, that is a mission accomplished!

I had been finding it really difficult to get hold of any Biology tutors to speak with me about biodiveristy, but since filming Nigel, all of them want to talk to me. They've all been very supportive and provided me with a wealth of information that will enable me to start filming Biodiversity. I am a little worried about this film, as I think it will end up quite long, and because it will be more corporate I need to think carefully about the music, the effects and what to shoot. And I only have three weeks now!

Hopefully, I will finish Energy next week, it's only a short film and I have three days to spend on it. Will it be difficult and challenging? Yes. Impossible? Nothing is impossible.

Energy

After logging and capturing Energy I felt very deflated and unenthused about editing it. It was another hurdle I had to get over and seemed like a daunting task that would be near impossible. However, as soon as the rough edit was done (which took a grand total of two hours), the hurdle didn't seem so unreachable. I was, slowly, ticking off my To Do list. After the meeting, which only me, Kat, Mike and Kirsty E turned up to, I galloped through editing stages on Energy.
Energy is at current, only 15 seconds long. Quick adverts seem to be a popular choice in media web ads at the moment, they 'get in and get out' as quickly as possible, conveying the message simply but effectively. I think the snappy style of Energy will make an impact and not leave the audience bored. The message is simple: 'Don't waste energy, turn things off.' I wont be using as much voice over or text as I did in Recycling. Although there are statistics of the Co2 emmissions released from BSU, I don't want Energy to become a corporate video, discussing the good and the bad. People already know that wasting energy is a bad thing, and if we don't reduce Co2, polar bears will die, sea levels will rise, habitats will be destroyed, animals and people will become victims of natural disasters and eventually we will destroy the world (supposidly). I don't want Energy to become another film about how we are killing the planet and what will happen to it. Energy isn't designed to depress its audience. Instead, I want to portray a simple and effective message that hopefully, will change the behaviour of even a few students at BSU and make them more aware of how much energy they are wasting. It is afterall, a video for BSU's environmental web page, directed to current and prospective staff and students.
I'm not going to become 'precious' about Energy as I did about Recycling. I spent way too much time on that film and because of that, have less time to spend on Energy and Biodiversity. I will have to reduce the quality of Energy and Biodiversity, as it is better to hit the deadline (as Nic said) because in the media business, you have to produce the goods on time, excuses just wont cut it.
I'm being a little adventurous, but I reckon I could possibly have Energy nearly completed before I go to Oz and starting from now, I will be filming Biodiversity.
To Do:

• Music for Energy (Mike)
• Check voice overs, collect text
• Sound effects
• Colour correction
• Background image
• Do shot list for Biodiversity and film!

Recycling

Film 1, otherwise known as Recycling, is complete! This first film was a challenge for me, I was new fairly new to FCP and remembering how to use the other equipment was a slow process. What should have taken me three weeks, took five. I didn't manage to grade the film because I was running out of time and had to focus on film 2, Energy. I hope that if i have time at the end I can come back to film 1 and grade it. I had a lot of help from others, including Mike, who mixed and did something else (basically made it listenable) to the music, Jona, who stepped in as an actor and has been my filming buddy and Ollie and Dani, who have guided me through FCP. I feel, that thanks to them I have gained some skills that will make editing Energy that little more easier and bearable.

I have logged and captured Energy and will be coming up with a storyboard in the near future. I know that I want this film to be quicker and sharper and have a lot of effects put on it. If think the message in Recycling was a bit weak, although it does what it says on the tin, which is 'a film promoting recycling, directed towards students,' it doesn't have that edge that grabs attention. I am hoping that I have learned from my mistakes and will produce a more jazzy film 2 that grabs the audience.

Yesterday I managed to film a short interview with Nigel, one of the Biology tutors. He was great to interview, had an interesting voice and is more then happy to be filmed again. He gave me an overview of the biodiversity on the campus, and it has given me the foundations to approach the other Biology tutors and ask for their imput about the campus' biodiversity. I am hoping to find out about the species that are on the campus and give an overview of the surroundings and why it is important to take care of what is living here.

Not giving up

The last couple of weeks have been pretty hard for me, I had some pretty shitty things going on, not that they need to be mentioned, but the effect they had, was that my work and personal life was beginning to suffer. I haven't written a thing for either of my modules and my filming has been put on hold, mostly because I can't get hold of the people I need to film. I'm starting to panic ever so slightly. I have two films to film and edit in 5 weeks and 12,000 words to write in 8. But, panic I shall not, because nothing is impossible. I went to the New Forest, and although I enjoyed every second and gathered lots of material for my work, I still found myself too distracted to do anything (partly due to the arguement I had with my sister the night before going) and so came back early in the hope to catch up on some work.

Instead I listened to Bob Marley and lost myself in the world of internet, and searched for things I could do in Australia. I then found a car on Autotrader that I plan to see next week and hopefully buy if it's any good, a nice little black Golf GTI. Oh, and I made a quiche.

So, looking like i'd hugged the pillsbury dough boy, I sat at my computer and shuffled through my research papers, and what I found was: although I haven't actually written anything for two of my modules yet, what I do have is a vast amount of research and i'm now ready to put pen to paper. When I thought I was getting nowhere and achieving nothing with my writing, I realised that the whole time, I was doing work. I had read books, spoken to people who know more about wild horses than me and had been to the New Forest to see them for myself. And now I have decided not to give up, and instead, to sit at my computer until I write 500 words, for those first words are the hardest. As I write this, Bob Marley's, Three little birds starts to play... How ironic.

Plan for this week:

• Film something for either Energy or Biodiversity.
• Log and capture anything I have.
• Write some of my 'Wild Ponies' project.
• Start to pull together Energy film.

Oh what a day!

Today started pretty stressfully, but ended pretty damn good. As soon as I write this i'm off to the cinema. Whoop. What can I say? It's the simple things in life that please me.

I woke up with my To Do list sharing my pillow with me. It's become the last thing I look at before I go to sleep and the first when I wake up. And all it does is remind me that I still haven't ticked off the important things to do. I have actually started writing stupid things like: make lunch, just so I have something to tick off for the day. It's lame and it doesn't get my work done.

I then went into Artswork Media and had a little rant about how much work I had to do and how little time I had. It didn't solve my problems, but I felt so much better aftwards.

I then did a food shop and was subjected to the worst chat up line ever: 'Do you come here often?' In which I answered: 'Only when I need to buy food.' Within two minutes I knew his job occupation, what car he drove and that he was conveniently single. WIERD!

I then had a seminar and talked with my tutor, Jonathan, about my work and how I felt like it was going nowhere. His answer was: 'Don't worry, you'll do it, you just gotta find it in you.' Yes, well, that's easier said than done. But, I do feel strangely better about my work since talking to him, and it reminded me that, even though work stresses me out and deadlines creep ever closer, somehow, I manage to land on my feet and hand everything in on time and of a quality that I am happy with.

The day ended pretty damn good because I managed to network with Sophie Cole from the BBC and she has given me a golden ticket!! I will let you know what that golden ticket was if it all goes well...

But for now, i'm off to the cinema.

Where do I start?

I've given up trying to avoid writing a blog. It turns out that I have to do one as part of the assessment for Creative Enterprise.

Assignments: An artefact (Eco Campus). A blog or diary (otherwise known as the critical commentary and bane of Creative Writing. Except now i'll have to log weekly). Appendix (photocopied notebooks).

And so it starts: my blog, a boring reflection on what I am doing for enterprise. Maybe i'll add a few personal entries here and there just to make it more interesting.

So, where do I start? I guess i'll have to kick off from where I am at the moment, because there is no way I am back logging all that I have done so far. Which isn't really that much. I've filmed (with the help of Jona) and edited the first film for Eco Campus: Recycling. Filming in the snow wasn't the best fun i've ever had, my feet actually went numb. The actor, who isn't really an actor, but a first year student who lives in my block, saved my skin. The actor I had originally asked to be in my film dropped out at the last minute (the morning of filming) and thankfully Josh agreed to be filmed. Vanity sure is a useful sin. Jona too was a saving grace, I don't think I would have remembered which buttons to press if it wasn't for him. Filming went well, even if we did nearly get attacked by swans. But am I happy with the film? No, not really. It didn't turn out the way that I wanted it to. It's not as quick, sharp or fast paced as i'd have hoped, the plot isn't exactly thrilling and when showing a group of first years at university the film to get some feedback, the only response I had was:

'Who's the guy in it? He's cute.'

Hello, people? It's a promotional film about saving the world by recycling, and all you care about is the blonde? Kind of says it all doesn't it?

It has taken me five painstakingly long weeks to finish Recycling, I have spent day after day, staring at my borrowed MacBook Pro screen, hoping that Final Cut Pro will grow a conscious mind and help me finish the film. I am no longer precious about Recycling, and will glad to see the back of it. Tomorrow will be the last day that I will watch it and make some edits, and then that's it. I wont open it, edit it or even watch it, not until the other two films are near completion. I am beginning to think that completing three films by May 13th is about as likely as, I don't know, something unlikely. I'm starting to think that going to Australia for nearly a month, in the middle of the second semester in my final year at university wasn't the best decision i've ever made. How am I ever going to do all that I need to do in seven weeks?

Plan for this week:

• Finish filming Energy (film 2),
• Log and capture footage,
• Gather notes and make texts and voice overs.
• Possibly do a rough edit?